So if you have been cheated by your spouse (see below), you are probably very depressed from the weeks, months, or even years of sexual refusal. So much so that you never bring it up any more. You just suffer in silence.
How do you deal with it? Well that is a loaded question that has a myriad of possible answers. I am just going to talk about a few ways.
First, you have to stop criticizing yourself. Just because your spouse refuses sex with you does not mean that you are a jerk or bad husband. If you are still thoughtful and nice, she should be glad to have you. There are lots of women who would love to have a husband who would work and spend time with them.
The next thing I would do is to exercise. If you are not already a member, join a gym. There is a Planet Fitness in almost every town in this country. If you don’t like it, there are lots of other choices. You will find that breaking out in a sweat and getting lots of oxygen will do wonders for your attitude. You can listen to music on your phone or even watch videos while you are on a treadmill. Exercise will lift your spirits and help you realize that you are a worthwhile person, even if you are married to a cheater. (Again, I am using the definition of cheater below.)
Lastly, enjoy your life. You are not obligated to be at your cheater’s beck and call and spend all of your waking hours with her. She has arbitrarily decided to end a very important part of your life and you have the right to reclaim the rest of it.
Maybe someday, a preacher will state that a refuser is a sinner. No, it’ll never happen.