A few days ago, I got a text from a friend I have known over 30 years. He has been married a bit longer than I have and was married before. I am one of the few people who actually remember his first wife.
We had a very nice lunch, enjoyed some small talk, and he mentioned that he had not seen me at church in a long while. I explained to him that I was separated, and would probably be divorcing soon.
He was shocked, of course, and asked me what happened. I told him a lot of things, but that the final straw was no sex for almost 6 years. When I told him this, his jaw dropped open. When I told him that my refusing cheater had also insulted my penis, and told me that I should be ok with never having sex again, he shook his head.
He was very understanding, and told me that I had exhibited amazing patience, and I should not feel bad at all for leaving my wife. He said that in his 30+ years of marriage, the longest he had ever been celibate was 3 weeks, and that was really hard.
So it is very nice to be validated.
However, it would really be nice to hear that sexual refusal in marriage is a sin from a pulpit.